Heathers

A friend at work loaned me her copy of Heathers and I just got finished watching it.

And man, is my head screwed up.

This was one dark, dark teen-angst movie. I can’t decide if it was funny or disturbing. Probably both. First of all, it drips “80’s”, which makes sense since it was made in 1989, but the print of the movie even feels 80-ish in its grainyness. On the other hand, its widescreen and has a THX audio track makes it feel like a ‘modern’ DVD print.

Second thing is, this guy Christian Slater…I’ll admit I’m not familiar with him but he was doing this “Geez, I really really really REALLY want to be a young Jack Nicholson” thing that was just fucking surreal. Maybe he’s always like that…I dunno. But it really was creeping me out.

Oh yeah, and then there’s the story. Winona Ryder stars as Veronica, who is one of the hardcore popular clique of girls in Sherwood High School. The other three are all named Heather, ergo the title. Veronica is the only one with a dribble or so of conscience (while the other three are complete bitches to everyone around them..will there every be a movie where the popular girls are, y’know, liked by their classmates?), and essentially she hates her friends and wishes they were dead. And guess what? She gets her wish. But I won’t go farther into it. Let’s just say suicide becomes the hot new trend at Sherwood High.

Best quote, and I have to paraphrase, is Veronica’s mom telling her “You want to be treated like a grown-up? What do you think, being grown up is all about doubles tennis? Usually a teenager says she wants to be treated like a grown-up exactly WHEN she is being treated like a grown-up.” OK, I’ve butchered it, but it was a great quote.

Really dark, really strange, funny in a sort of shocking “oh my gawd!” way… actually funny isn’t even the word. Amusing would be better. Like when you watch a video clip of some poor kid wiping out spectacularly on his motocross bike and for some reason you cringe and kind of laugh, even though you know the poor bastard probably just broke his leg…. well, Heathers is 90 minutes of that feeling.

%d bloggers like this: